Santa Ynez Trail

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Trail Description
DISTANCE 4.5 miles
ELEVATION GAIN down, down, down then up, up, up
PARKING $10 in the lot. Free in the dirt.
SPF 22.
CHANCE OF INJURY 30% chance of twisted ankles, 70% chance of poison oak.
WEIRD SMELLS Puma shit.
TIME 3 hours.
FEATURES Picnic areas, Cadillac restroom facilities, caves, boulders, and a "waterfall."
ANIMALS Butterflies, lizards, and tree snakes.
CELEBRITY SIGHTINGS ABC 7's George Pennacchio.
DOG SHIT 0-dog, 1-puma.
ANYTHING ELSE? Giant granite tanning wall.
Directions
Driving Directions
Get to the 101, get on the 101, and get to The Valley. When you begin to smell a gigantic mall complex, turn left (South) on Topanga Canyon Blvd. You're going to go over a large mountain and a few miles down the other side look for the Entrada Rd and Topanga State Park signs. If you drive into the ocean, you've gone too far. Turn left and Entrada winds through some upscale hippie neighborhood. Stay on Entrada until… you see the Topanga State Park sign, and turn left there. You'll see some cars parked on the berm before the park to save $10. It's not Fryman Canyon, so it's pretty safe to do that if you don't mind the extra walking.
Hiking Directions
There's a fireroad at the end of the parking lot that starts heading uphill. If you're looking for a big sign that says "Santa Ynez waterfall This Way!" you will be disappointed. Start up the fireroad towards Eagle Rock, and you'll see a Santa Ynez Trail sign to the right. Follow that down to the bottom of the valley and you'll see a "Waterfall" sign. So follow that. You're now basically scrambling up the creek bed but don't worry - there's not much of a creek. That's good news for your hike, but bad news at your "waterfall." It's pathetic. But keep you head up, there are a number of great caves to explore along the canyon walls above the trail.
The Story
One of the lesser known Cyclops's, Mike, lived in Santa Ynez Canyon for 20 - 30,000 years. Back then he mostly ate dinosaurs and threw rocks at clouds. Did you know that for every god the Greeks wrote stories about, there were at least 50 other gods who just kinda hung out and didn't really do anything of note. Like Mike.