Nike Missile Site Trail

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Trail Description
DISTANCE Under 2 Miles
ELEVATION GAIN 500 feet(ish)
PARKING Plenty of dirt parking if your car can handle some bumpy dirt roads.
SPF 90. Full sun...even at night!
TIME 45 to 90 minutes
FEATURES Bathrooms, Drinking Fountains, Picnic Area, Telescopes, Handicap Parking, Radar Towers, Computer Bunkers, Chain Link Razor Wire…FUN
ANIMALS Dogs, Mountain Bikers
CELEBRITY SIGHTINGS If Lance Armstrong were fat, he would be this one guy I saw.
Directions
DRIVING DIRECTIONS:
You get off the 101 and head south on Havenhurst. Don’t expect a Starbucks or AM/PM right there. You’ll have to peel off down Ventura if you forgot water or need to get more Skoal.  Going up hill south of Ventura Blvd, Havenhurst twists and turns so watch the signs. Then, it turns into  CALDERNA. It’s a left turn, but it’s not that hard to notice. Then, at the top of the hill you turn  right on Mulholland. Remember – Douche-bags turn left, you turn right (lot’s of rush hour douche-bags in the morning). In a quarter mile you’ll see the dirt road intersection.  YOU MUST ENTER THE WORLD OF DIRT!  Turn left and park 100 yards up.  It’s refreshing to drive on dirt. And it’s not that crazy – you’re weasely buddies Mini Cooper will make it fine.
 
HIKING DIRECTIONS:
It’s a Fire Road for almost a mile. Look for hawks, or helicopters, or clouds shaped like Santa, because you’ll have to pass the time with some game because the hike is dull. However, when you get to the top… Good Time Weirdness!
Read all the signs. People used to be really afraid of Russians. They were like Al-Qaeda, or NBA players.
People with dogs, rejoice! This place has water and bowls. People with bladders, rejoice! This place also has restrooms.   People with bags of garbage, rejoice! This place also has many garbage cans.
The missile tower and goofy signs and miles of chain-link fence are all restored to a “just good enough” state that it feels like you are at a museum the day after they stopped charging admission. This is definitely a high traffic trail. Lot’s of mountain bikers, some cars drive the route, many dogs… but it’s something you have to do once.  If you have a mountain bike, dog, or handicap tag for your car – you may come twice.

THE STORY:
Theme restaurants went berserk after the success of the Brown Derby.  However, unpaved roads and no working kitchen were the downfall of Missel Base – The Restaurant