Lake Hollywood Loop Trail

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Trail Description
DISTANCE 3.3 miles for the asphalt loop & 1.4 miles for the dirty dirt loop.
ELEVATION 0 feet. The only flat trail in town aside from the beach.
PARKING Loads of street parking on the hill. I hope your parking brake is working.
SPF10. A lot more shade than you'd think.
CHANCE OF INJURY Just like milk, 2%. Unless you get caught inside after sunset, then 98% chance of razor wire poisoning.
WEIRD SMELLS Duck poop and pond water.
TIME 1.5 hour walk, 30 min run, 5 min bike, 45 sec jetpack.
FEATURES Dam, big pile of water, DWP security, port-a-potties, drinking fountains.
ANIMALS Deer - not in herds, but in choreographed dance crews.
CELEBRITY SIGHTINGS Erik Estrada... or at least a guy with his teeth.
DOG SHIT No dogs allowed.
ANYTHING ELSE? Open sunrise to sunset... and no swimming or nudity. (Nudity is negotiable, swimming is not)

Get to the 101 and head to Universal Studios. Take the Barham exit and head uphill towards Burbank. (don't worry, if you robbed a Burbank bank, we'll turn before they serve the warrant on you) Turn right on Lake Hollywood Drive at the top of the hill. Weave through the neighborhoods and turn right to head downhill towards the reservoir. Don't turn right until you see the lake. Don't worry, it's all still Lake Hollywood Drive. At the bottom of the hill, you park. Turn your wheels and pull your parking brake.

Let's just be Americans and walk clockwise around the lake, okay? You start on a sidewalk along the road, but the cars soon turn uphill, and the trail (okay, asphalt walking road) continues around the reservoir. You get to the dam and cross that and then continue back along the lake/reservoir back to your car. If you are even slightly in shape, when you get to the dam, consider turning left and heading through the giant fenced gate uphill on the dirt trail. That climbs above the reservoir and ends at the Hollywood Sign viewing area on Canyon Lake Drive. Once there you can walk down the road, to Tahoe Drive, and then continue your loop.

Movie Stars love getting awards, and water skiing. When young Abe Vigoda left the Catskills at 9 years old to become a Hollywood star, he lived in these hills and Lake Hollywood was just a frontier beaver dam. Abe got tired of hitting beavers while waterskiing so he tricked FDR into building the Lake Hollywood dam by dressing up like Jesus and sneaking into his bedroom one night. Abe came to FDR in a dream (as Jesus) and told him to build a kick-ass dam called Lake Hollywood, or else he'd tell Eleanor about his affair with Lucy Mercer, her secretary. Boom, dam was built in 6 months.